Seems like I've always attached myself to the females in my family. Mom, grandma, my aunts. There was never really an uncle present. I always wanted to hear what the ladies were talking about. The men's conversations were shallow and unproductive. Except for uncle Bernard.
Uncle Bernard was mom's uncle and worked with mom's dad, Roger Rearick, at the time of his death. He was also married to Grandpa Rearick's sister, aunt Mildred. Uncle Bernard taught us that it was okay to be yourself, make funny noises, make people laugh. As adults, he ended up not liking me or my brothers to very much. In the end, he favored our cousins. Though he hid it, he never was very fond of dad, the "Mexican"!
Dad and I never got along, just a big difference in personalities that was an obstacle to a more developed and nurturing relationship. Actually, I really disliked dad, when I was a kid. I got yelled at, belittled, and spanked, a bunch! I know he tried. He took me fishing and camping, but it never seemed to be a joyful adventure. Labored on his part. As an adult, I attempted to cultivate a relationship with him, that culminated in him asking me why I kept coming over to see him, after all, I wasn't asking for money, so why was I there? My response was, too spend time with you. I don't think he grasped that on the level I was offering.
Uncle Walt, he was standoffish at best. Never a harsh or critical word directed towards me. Just mostly silence. He did take my cousin Kenneth and I out hiking along the river, and pointed out wildlife features that you can only learn in the woods, so there's that. I think he was mindful of dad and did not try to exert much influence over or on me.
Grandpa John. He was a grumpy old man as my memory recalls. He was a short man, that always had a cigar or a pipe in his mouth. He was a WW 2 veteran, and enjoyed his beer. He liked bingo, checkers, fishing, and helping grandma make quilts. He was always short tempered around us kids, always. Granma kept him in check. I must have got my mechanical genes from him, cause they didn't come from dad!
So, what I'm getting at, is that growing up, my male influencers were minimal, and the men that had an opportunity to assist me in my youth were either not present or maybe even were a bit neglectful. Not casting shade here, just looking for the pieces of my world that have made me, me.
